


Impropriety

by pineaberry



Category: Star Wars Legends: The Old Republic
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-27
Updated: 2018-08-27
Packaged: 2019-07-03 09:52:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 681
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15816507
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pineaberry/pseuds/pineaberry
Summary: In game you get a little snippet of Quinn asking the Sith Warrior what she meant when she flirted with him. It turns out she did indeed have him tossing and turning in his bunk, just... not for the reasons anyone would expect.





	Impropriety

It was wrong.

Malavai lay in his bunk staring at the ceiling unable to convince his brain to shut off. Every night was the same struggle since they’d returned to the ship. He tried to ignore his feelings but they were becoming unbearable. The sheets were too rough against his skin, the mattress too stiff, or so his mind protested. Funny how he’d not had the same trouble sleeping on Tatooine’s rough terrain.

They’d shared a bedroll to keep hypothermia at bay. There had been no other purpose for it. And yet he remembered how gentle she’d been, never mocking his embarrassment, never demanding any more from him than he was willing to give. She always allowed him to join her at his own pace. He’d grown more and more comfortable with her presence each time.

Quinn swallowed hard as he allowed himself to recall her form pressed against his back, and the weight of her arms around his waist. He remembered how she’d held him and inadvertently soothed his anxieties. Her presence stilled his frantic thoughts and allowed him the freedom to rest.

She could destroy him with a thought. As a Sith, the disparity in their power was so great that no one would dare question her superiority. Faced with such an absolute, for the first time in his life, Malavai felt he was allowed to be weak.

In her embrace, responsibilities, pressure, and feelings of inadequacy melted away. As his clinical exterior was stripped from him, he’d felt so small and fragile. In her arms there was warmth, kindness… protection. She promised to take care of him and damn him if he didn’t melt into her arms every night drinking in her touch as though his life depended on it.

He groaned and face-palmed with embarrassment. He was fantasizing about being cuddled.

Malavai knew what his father would say. The Colonel would berate him for his ‘womanly’ feelings, accusing him of being no better than the whores that lusted after other men… right before delivering a sound beating. His mother would laugh. Shame doused his yearnings and he turned to lay on his side, curled up under the covers.

Real men would be thinking about the curve of her waist, her lips, her eyes… they would imagine her naked form pinned down beneath him, submitting to him. Yet even should he picture such things, he felt nothing. His mind kept wandering to memories of the weight of her arms around his waist settling just so; of waking up to the feeling her small calloused fingers running through his hair; of her asking him if he knew the names of the stars as his head rested on her lap; of finding refuge from the day by hiding his face against her shoulder…

What is wrong with me?

She was a Sith.

Malavai had seen other unfortunate Imperials who were reduced to little more than their Lord’s plaything. Even if she did show interest in him it would be on her terms. He would become a toy to fulfill her desires not his own damaged yearnings.

She would be repulsed.

The realization hurt more than it should have and he shut his eyes tightly.

Real men would have responded in kind to her flirting, but like a fool he had balked and sidestepped the conversation. Had she just been toying with him? Surely his lord knew a relationship between them would be absurd, but then, people had meaningless sex all the time, didn’t they? He would have to ask her directly. Reaffirming his dedication to the Empire would put these thoughts to rest and allow her to see that he had no interest in… sordid affairs.

He tried not to think too much about his own latent desires, instead focusing on how he would broach the subject tomorrow. Tomorrow he would clarify his position, and his foolish notions would be discarded. Tomorrow, he would discreetly ask her to clarify her intentions, perhaps after delivering a status report on the ship so it would not be obvious.

I’ll ask her tomorrow…

**Author's Note:**

> I blame ALL of you for this…
> 
> a-mustache-named-doc, riajade01, kunoichi-ume, semper-draca, starrypawz
> 
> YOU ALL KNOW WHAT YOU DID!
> 
> Seriously though, they are wonder Tumblr peeps and deserve all your love and attention!
> 
> This fic was originally posted on my Tumblr (pineaberry) look me up there for updates/additions to the verse. :)


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